Thursday, March 13, 2008

Boosting the Economy... strategy by a little feller

March 13, 2008
Colorado USA

The check is in the mail or how are you spending your rebate check?

As you may have heard the Bush Administration will send each tax payer (at least those tax payers who have filed a tax return) a nice tax rebate this year. You may have received your Economic Stimulus Payment Notice from the I.R.S. The idea is: if the little feller spends his rebate on consumer goods -- it will stimulate the U.S. economy.

If we spend that money on socks or anything at WalMart, all the money will go to China. If we spend it on gasoline or other oil-related prouct it will all go to the the middle east.

How does that stimulate the American U.S. economy?

We need to keep that money here in America (U.S.)!

So the only way for the little feller to help stimulate the American (U.S.) Economy is:
  1. Buy Beer
  2. Indulge in Porn
  3. Hire a Prostitute
...since those are the only businesses still operating in the U.S.A.

Little Fellers Unite!

FYI: I follow America-American with U.S. because lest we forget, people north and south of our borders consider themselves American, too. America, technically speaking North America is: a continent not a country.

Thanks to friend Nancy for sharing this... I took a few liberties with the gist of it and while I was thinking about it came up with a few questions...

So will you squander your rebate check? Or squirrel it away - Uncle Sam Forbid! - for a rainy day? How much relief will $500-$600 provide in your economic situation? How close is it to a week's pay for the little feller? Just how many tanks of gas, gallons of milk, loaves of bread, jars of baby food, carts of groceries, steaks, packs of cigarettes, cases of beer will your rebate buy? Careful now - how many of those items are made here in the good ol U.S.A.?

Of course we're not supposed to save it. Or pay bills. Or pay off debt with it becuzzZZzzZZzz according to the experts, that won't stimulate the economy. I disagree. One might pay off or pay down the balance on a credit card and being typically American go out and charge that card up again. How many of us could actually pay off a credit card balance with it anyway? Will it pay your annual cable/internet/cell phone bill? How many times can you go out to eat on it? With the price of wheat/flour sky-rocketing, how many pizzas can you order?

What big ticket item can you buy with that rebate check? Forget it - you won't be able to afford the door knob at The Emperor's Club. It's not enough for a down payment on anything, it won't make a house payment for most of us, it might make a car payment and a half and given the price of gas, airline tickets and hotel rooms you're not going to get very far away for very long for a vacation unless you are bunking with your crazy ol' Aunt Biddy in Bohunkville. It might be enough for an attorney to consider filing your bankruptcy claim.

So I'm guessing the powers that be think we will buy small luxury items. Small being the operative word here... luxury being our middle name... OK. It will buy your kids a new bicycle or video game and maybe some new athletic shoes. It will buy a small stereo, decent sound system, DVD player, new cell phones for the family, really small HDTV, lawn mower, gas grill, or middle of the line appliance. It will buy a decent desktop computer but not a laptop with all the bells and whistles. It will buy an iPOD and a few tunes to go on it. It will buy the coveted hand held GPS navigator, that, for the life of me I cannot fathom the need for (that's another story). It might get you really good seats at a concert or sporting event provided you don't live too far away. It might pay your electric bill a couple of times (or if you live somewhere besides Texas, maybe three or four times). It might allow you to make a minor home improvement.

Failing all that, it might make a substantial donation to a charity of your choice. And, if you can't think of a single item to add to your pile of treasures - you can always contribute to a campaign fund. Duh! Maybe you can buy your way to Denver in August - the word is... the Democratic Convention will be a hoot this time around.

Now, think about it -- how far will that money go if you eliminate product made in a country other than the U.S.A.?

Only in America! The good ol' U.S.A! The government will send you a check to buy a new pretty and most of us will happily comply and turn a blind eye to the bottom line, both the country's and our own. Be grateful! And enjoy! And hope it doesn't come back to bite you on the butt...

'Nuff said...

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Happy Dull as Donuts Day aka 'Nother Super Tuesday

March 4, 2008
Colorado USA

Here we go again... or still. The same faces, the same dull rhetoric, the same endless speculation... who will quit, who will hang on, who just won't go away... does anyone really believe anything will be decided today?

For those of us who may not care to watch the hypnotic scroll of endless poll results, projections and predictions... I can offer a few slim alternatives for your viewing pleasure. Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium (Dustin Hoffman) is out on DVD ( I have a date to watch this one with friends tonight). Into the Wild (does not end well) is also out on DVD and Disney's 101 Dalmatians (yikes!). Too bad we have to wait another week to see No Country for Old Men. Pay-Per-View has a few more options (Michael Clayton, 3:10 to Yuma, a couple of sappy romances) but nothing to get excited about. Woo Hoo! Jericho has a new episode airing tonight but that's about it. I take that back - there's always hockey! Will Peter play - will he not. Now, there's a mystery for ya. GO AVS! Of course, there's always TWC and HGTV reruns. Ha! No, I will not consider mentioning AI in anything more than abbreviated form. You people (AI people) live in a world all your own where the quality of entertainment is apparently not why you watch. I don't know why you watch - I don't want to know why you watch. It's scary. What may be a more pertinent question is do you (AI people) vote -- I mean in real elections?

As for me, I'll watch a movie with friends, maybe some hockey and then finish the evening off with a book. Tomorrow morning is soon enough... to get the results of the primaries - and if tomorrow never comes -- well, we're saved that bit of grief. Yawn!